JONOMATOPOEIA

Just listened to the Girl Talk bootleg that appeared on Good Weather For Airstrikes a few months ago. The title says it all.

Was there a soul out there doing mashups in 2007 who didn’t mix Nirvana’s ‘Lithium’ into a frothy pop track? This time, Mr. Gillis is frotting not one but two JT tracks against Seattle’s biggest export. (See what he did there?) Like his ‘Lithium’ / ‘Gimme More’ mashup at Brown Alley earlier this year, it’s a whole lot of fun.

Props to Rohan Bassett for passing me this one onto me, like a true gangsta, on CD-R.

I kind of thought a grammar school could get through a piece of correspondence sans grammatical clangers—but, hey, maybe I’m just old-fashioned.

Pass on this invitation to other old boys who haven’t heard of it, or we may of lost.

The above snippet is from the invitation to my old school’s five-year reunion. The event itself transpired largely as predicted: there was a vegetarian option that apparently had a strangely high chicken-quotient; a head of year ­­still unsure of exactly who the fuck I was; a bottleneck (ha—­­pun) at the bar as everyone sought out social lubrication for the inevitable small-talk circle-jerks they’d find themselves engaged in.

When we were booted out at the end of the function, Mr. Ziebell and I, full of school spirit and Victoria Bitter, found ourselves at the local underage dive. At about five AM I discovered that I’d come home and dozed off on top of my doona, with the lights still on, completely naked. Viriliter Agite indeed.

Much like with The Knife’s utterly bizarre ‘Christmas Reindeer’ last year, I couldn’t help but a get an old-school rush of Christaversary spirit (yes, in spite of the gloomy subject matter) when I stumbled across this Lightspeed Champion song on YouTube. I’m a sucker for the indie Christmas track, and that’s no lie.

Merry Xmas, one and all!

Did anyone else see CNN’s silly season uber-gaffe yesterday? (Seriously, a quick Googling indicates that this one went under the radar.)

Now, Jonomatopoeia may been imbibing freely on the night of November 24, but he was lucid enough to note that the outcome of the night was a much more expected KEVIN Rudd victory. It seemed that lucidity only settled upon the CNN opium den a couple of hours after the report went live, and a hasty correction was HTML’d.

But imagine if Paul Rudd was our PM. He does double-denim-clad belligerence so well. (Shades of Latham here?)

And that’s not to mention this star turn as a madly leering 16-bit videogame enthusiast:

At the very least we would have had a more rousing victory speech.

… pretty win, it seems.

But peep this:

I’m gonna take my time / She gon’ get hers before I / I’m gonna take it slow / I’m not gonna rush to stroll, so she can get a / Sensual seduction-duction, so I can get a / Sensual seduction-duction.
(Dogg, 2007)

Cf.

Dre got some bitches from the city of Compton / To serve me, not with a cherry on top / ‘Cause when I bust my nut, I’m raisin’ up off the cot / Don’t get upset girl, thats just how it goes / I don’t love you hoes, I’m out the door.
(Dogg, 1993)

Ironic flourishes? A desire to meet the needs of a sexual partner before his own are addressed? Will Snoop Dee-to-tha-Double-Oh-Gee have to turn in his gangsta badge and gun?

Before we go overboard, though, it should perhaps be noted that the non-MTV-friendly version of the song is actually called ‘Sexual Eruption’.

I can’t take credit for this — the neologism’s all Jelly.

But now at least it’s been deemed legit by the Urban Dictionaryscenti. (It’s just a shame the site approves so much vomit.)

Another few (hundred) thumbs up and it’ll be a Word of the Day contender. Go get ‘em tigers!

Peace and fucking. Believe.

This, completely random, character wants to befriend me on Facebook. Going by the profile-morsels supplied below, what would you do?

(Y/N? — I’m totally selling this as a programming concept to MTV, right?)

Supplementary question: ‘Is Jono a wanker?’

Re this post straight outta Crack Province, I’ve compiled a list of Linguistics terms that sound smutty. Do enjoy:

I saw a man walking a llama down Elgin Street tonight. No, really. The moon was hanging low and full with pre-eclipse anticipation and this man’s llama was listlessly grazing on a patch of grass next to Beaurepaires.

A llama – doubleyou-tee-eff? I know.